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Help With Anger Management
Help With Anger Management
by Steven Klamm
Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men: How to Free Yourself from the Grip of Anger and Get More Out of Life
Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men: How to Free Yourself from the Grip of Anger and Get More Out of Life
by Thomas J. Harbin
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The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
by Harriet Lerner
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How to Take the Grrrr Out of Anger (Laugh & Learn)
How to Take the Grrrr Out of Anger (Laugh & Learn)
by Elizabeth Verdick Marjorie Lisovskis
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The Anger Trap: Free Yourself from the Frustrations that Sabotage Your Life
The Anger Trap: Free Yourself from the Frustrations that Sabotage Your Life
by Les Carter
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Cool Down and Work Through Anger (Learning to Get Along)
Cool Down and Work Through Anger (Learning to Get Along)
by Cheri J. Meiners M.Ed.
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The Anger Workbook: A 13-Step Interactive Plan to Help You... (Minirth-Meier Clinic Series)
The Anger Workbook: A 13-Step Interactive Plan to Help You... (Minirth-Meier Clinic Series)
by Les Carter Dr. Frank Minirth
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Anger and Your Driving: How to Cope With Dangerous Emotions (Part 1)

from: Dr. Tony Fiore




Are you driving under the influence of impaired emotions?
Dateline: December 4, 2002. Orange County, California.
A 29 year old man was shot to death, an apparent victim of road rage. According to newspaper accounts, he had a reputation for never backing down from a fight.

The man and his half-brother were heading home from a plumbing job when the trouble began. Apparently, three men in another car zoomed in front of their car. These men started hurling profanities and flashing obscene gestures at the brothers, who returned the insults.

Things escalated until a gun was pulled. Rather than backing down, the man got out of his car and began walking toward the gunman. Two shots rang out, missing the man who continued to walk toward the gunman until he was shot and killed.

While this tragic incident is illustrative of an extreme case of aggressive driving, there are thousands of lesser cases in the United States yearly. According to the AAA Foundation for Traffic Safety, incidents of aggressive driving have increased by 7% every year since 1990; however, few courts mandate anger management for traffic offenders.

Five Zones of Aggressive Driving: Research by Dr. Leon James at the University of Hawaii reveals five categories of aggressive driving. Which zone do you or a loved one fall in?

-The Unfriendly Zone: Example – closing ranks to deny someone entering your lane because you’re frustrated or upset.

-The Hostile Zone: Example – Tailgating to pressure another driver to go faster or get out of the way.

-The Violent Zone: Example – Making visible obscene gestures at another driver.

-The Less Mayhem Zone: Example – Pursuing other cars in a chase because of provocation or insult.

-The Major Mayhem Zone: Example – Getting out of the car and beating or battering someone as a result of road rage.

Like drunk driving, aggressive driving is more than a simple action or carelessness; it is a choice. According to Dr. James and his research team, drivers who consider themselves as almost perfect in excellence (with no room to improve) also confessed to significantly more aggressiveness than drivers who see themselves as still improving.

What this means is that despite their self- confessed aggressiveness, 2 out of 3 drivers still insist on seeing themselves as near perfect with almost no room to improve.

These drivers see ‘the other guy’ as the problem and thus do not look at their own aggressive driving behavior.

What causes aggressive driving behavior? While there is no one standard definition for aggressive driving, many psychologists see anger as the root cause of the problem. Regardless of the provocation or the circumstances related to problems on the road, it is ultimately our emotional state, our stress levels and our thinking patterns that either cause us to drive aggressively or lead us to be the victims of others.

In short, many of us get in trouble because we are driving under the influence of impaired emotions, especially anger.

Like drunk driving, aggressive driving is more than a simple action or carelessness; it is a behavioral choice that drivers make.

It is normal and natural to feel angry when certain events frustrate us on the road. But, how do you deal with these angry feelings to cope with the situation more effectively?

Here are two ways to cope with impaired driving emotions. Research clearly shows that reducing stress and changing your self-talk can help you cope.

1.Reduce your stress. Driving is emotionally challenging because unexpected things happen constantly with which we must cope. We often drive under the pressure of time, or the pressure of congestion and delays which add to our general stress level.

Suggestions include listening to relaxing music or educational tapes on the road, leaving 15 minutes sooner and getting up earlier so you are less rushed.

2.Change your perspective with different self-talk. Learn to view the situation differently. Specific skills to do this will be outlined in Part 2 of this series.




About the Author

Dr. Tony Fiore is a So. California licensed psychologist, and anger management trainer. His company, The Anger Coach, provides anger and stress management programs, training and products to individuals, couples, and the workplace. Sign up for his free monthly newsletter "Taming The Anger Bee" at www.angercoach.com and receive two bonus reports.






 

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